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Everybody is Awful (Except You)

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More awful Inspirational quotes. If you dream it, you can do it. Think Positive. Really?

Barstool Sports presents Jim Florentine as the host of the Everybody is Awful (Except You) podcast. Jim has recorded six stand-up comedy albums and shot four full-length specials. On television Jim hosted 7 seasons of VH1 Classic's "That Metal Show" as well as lending his voice to the ground breaking "Crank Yankers". On radio Jim has been a regular on The Howard Stern show, the Opie & Anthony show and currently hosts his own program on Sirius. In addition Jim is a best selling author, world-renowned voice over talent, and has been featured in the film's "Beer League" with Artie Lange and "Trainwreck" with Amy Schumer. Subscribe now.

Everybody is Awful (Except You) with Jim Florentine

Awful Inspirational Quotes 3

<!DOCTYPE html><html lang="en"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width,initial-scale=1,maximum-scale=1,user-scalable=no,shrink-to-fit=no"><title>Inspirational Quotes For Your Monday</title><link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="https://htlbid.com/v3/app.barstoolsports.com/htlbid.css"><script async src="https://htlbid.com/v3/app.barstoolsports.com/htlbid.js"></script><script>window.htlbid=window.htlbid||{},htlbid.cmd=htlbid.cmd||[],htlbid.cmd.push((function(){htlbid.setTargeting("pagetype","blog"),htlbid.setTargeting("brandId","101"),htlbid.setTargeting("authorId","63521"),htlbid.setTargeting("tags",["Awful","quotes","inspirational","jim florentine "]),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_keywords",["mintzy","dinner mintz","barstool","minute","ben mintz","pizza","guy","show","lot","bit","poker tournament","calamari","waiter","7th grader","motherfucker"]),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_IABv2",["163"]),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_IABv3",["163"]),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_positive","0.13"),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_neutral","0.78"),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_negative","0.09"),htlbid.setTargeting("is_testing","no"),htlbid.layout()}))</script><script>var googletag = googletag || {};
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        pbjs.setConfig({ pageUrl: https://www.barstoolsports.com/video-podcast/2030940/inspirational-quotes-for-your-monday });</script><script src="https://d9rde3y35j061.cloudfront.net/script.js"></script><script src="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/embed.js" async></script><style>.union__content{font-family:-apple-system,HelveticaNeue,Roboto,sans-serif;font-weight:400;font-size:18px;color:#5a5b5d;word-wrap:break-word;box-sizing:border-box;padding:0 5px 32px 5px}.union__content p{padding:0;margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content img{display:block;width:100%!important;height:auto;margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content video{display:block!important;width:100%!important;height:auto;margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content .articleAd{text-align:center;margin:16px 0 0 0;background-color:#f5f5f5}.union__content .htlad__container{display:inline-block}.union__content p a{color:#377dc4}.union__content .oembed__wrapper{margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content blockquote:not(.twitter-video){display:block;margin:16px 0 0 0;padding:4px 12px;border-left:4px solid #77889a;font-style:italic;background:#f0f4f8;text-align:left;border-radius:0 6px 6px 0}.union__content blockquote:not(.twitter-video) p{font-style:italic}.union__content blockquote,q{quotes:none}.union__content iframe{max-width:100%}.union__content .bs-image-hidden{display:none}.union__content div.hq-image{width:fit-content;margin:0 auto}.union__content span.image-attribution,.union__content span.image-attribution a{color:#757575;font-size:12px;font-style:italic;letter-spacing:.1px;line-height:14px;text-decoration:none;padding:0;margin:0}.union__content .bs-videoPlayer .bs-videoPlayer__container,.union__content video-js,.wp-video{width:100%!important;height:0!important;position:relative;padding-bottom:56.25%;overflow:hidden;margin:16px 0 0 0}.wp-video video{width:100%!important;height:100%!important}.hq-image video{width:100%!important;height:100%!important}.union__content .bs-videoPlayer__container>iframe{position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;border:none}@media (prefers-color-scheme:dark){.union__content,body,html{background:#1c1c1c;color:#f1f1f1}.union__content blockquote:not(.twitter-video){border-left:4px solid #367dc4;background:#272c35}}</style><script>window.addEventListener("applicationDidBecomeActive",(()=>{document.querySelectorAll(".hq-image video[autoplay]").forEach((e=>e.play()))}))</script></head><body class="union__content"><p>"Everyday is special if you think so. Every moment is memorable if you feel so ..." </p><p>How exhausting would it be if you had to celebrate every moment? On the way here, I picked up a pretzel from a New York City street vendor, and I'll never think of that pretzel again. I'll never bring that up, because it wasn't that memorable. <strong>(9:56)</strong></p><p>"Is it a special day for a guy who has an important court date? He's gonna get 1 - 3 years in prison, is that a day to celebrate?" <strong>(16:13) </strong></p><p>"Think Positive." - Thanks. </p><p>You're commuting on your way to work and a tractor-trailer overturns on the highway, you're stuck for hours. Gasoline all over, the next exit is 6 miles up. Should I still think positive?" <strong>(17:26)</strong></p><p>"If you dream it, you can do it." Well, let's go over the statistical probability your kid has to make it to the big leagues <strong>(21:38)</strong></p><p>"Fuckin' Jessica Biel"<strong> (24:15)</strong></p><p>"Those who people who tried to bury you, didn't know you were a seed."<strong> (31:10)</strong></p><p><strong>New Merchandise Available</strong></p><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/nRbh6Lq" href="https://store.barstoolsports.com/products/everybody-is-awful-except-you-logo-hoodie?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63521_101_inspirational-quotes-for-your-monday&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63521_101_inspirational-quotes-for-your-monday"></a></div></div><div id="Article-Ad-Placeholder" data-union-ad></div></div><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/UoUhxjv" href="https://store.barstoolsports.com/products/everybody-is-awful-except-you-logo-tee?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63521_101_inspirational-quotes-for-your-monday&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63521_101_inspirational-quotes-for-your-monday"></a></div></div></div><p><strong>DL & Listen: Awful Inspirational Quotes</strong></p><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/aIvbmr8" href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/everybody-is-awful-except-you-with-jim-florentine/id1495087840"></a></div></div></div></body></html>

<p>"Everyday is special if you think so. Every moment is memorable if you feel so ..." </p><p>How exhausting would it be if you had to celebrate every moment? On the way here, I picked up a pretzel from a New York City street vendor, and I'll never think of that pretzel again. I'll never bring that up, because it wasn't that memorable. <strong>(9:56)</strong></p><p>"Is it a special day for a guy who has an important court date? He's gonna get 1 - 3 years in prison, is that a day to celebrate?" <strong>(16:13) </strong></p><p>"Think Positive." - Thanks. </p><p>You're commuting on your way to work and a tractor-trailer overturns on the highway, you're stuck for hours. Gasoline all over, the next exit is 6 miles up. Should I still think positive?" <strong>(17:26)</strong></p><p>"If you dream it, you can do it." Well, let's go over the statistical probability your kid has to make it to the big leagues <strong>(21:38)</strong></p><p>"Fuckin' Jessica Biel"<strong> (24:15)</strong></p><p>"Those who people who tried to bury you, didn't know you were a seed."<strong> (31:10)</strong></p><p><strong>New Merchandise Available</strong></p><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/nRbh6Lq" href="https://store.barstoolsports.com/products/everybody-is-awful-except-you-logo-hoodie?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63521_101_inspirational-quotes-for-your-monday&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63521_101_inspirational-quotes-for-your-monday"></a></div></div><div id="Article-Ad-Placeholder" data-union-ad></div></div><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/UoUhxjv" href="https://store.barstoolsports.com/products/everybody-is-awful-except-you-logo-tee?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63521_101_inspirational-quotes-for-your-monday&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63521_101_inspirational-quotes-for-your-monday"></a></div></div></div><p><strong>DL & Listen: Awful Inspirational Quotes</strong></p><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/aIvbmr8" href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/everybody-is-awful-except-you-with-jim-florentine/id1495087840"></a></div></div></div>

Inspirational Quotes For Your Monday

An Actual Adult Posted This On Facebook And It's Absolutely Stupid

Your 8-year-old didn't say this

This Deserves A Lot More Silence Than It Got

Be Prepared For An Avalanche of "I Got Vaccinated" Posts

Man attacks his online critic ...this is some Florida shit