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Everybody is Awful (Except You)

New York

"Be Safe!" - Thanks, normally around this time I run into traffic

Barstool Sports presents Jim Florentine as the host of the Everybody is Awful (Except You) podcast. Jim has recorded six stand-up comedy albums and shot four full-length specials. On television Jim hosted 7 seasons of VH1 Classic's "That Metal Show" as well as lending his voice to the ground breaking "Crank Yankers". On radio Jim has been a regular on The Howard Stern show, the Opie & Anthony show and currently hosts his own program on Sirius. In addition Jim is a best selling author, world-renowned voice over talent, and has been featured in the film's "Beer League" with Artie Lange and "Trainwreck" with Amy Schumer. Subscribe now.

Everybody is Awful (Except You) with Jim Florentine

Awful Inspiration Quotes Part 4

<!DOCTYPE html><html lang="en"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width,initial-scale=1,maximum-scale=1,user-scalable=no,shrink-to-fit=no"><title>Shitty Inspirational Quotes</title><link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="https://htlbid.com/v3/app.barstoolsports.com/htlbid.css"><script async src="https://htlbid.com/v3/app.barstoolsports.com/htlbid.js"></script><script>window.htlbid=window.htlbid||{},htlbid.cmd=htlbid.cmd||[],htlbid.cmd.push((function(){htlbid.setTargeting("pagetype","blog"),htlbid.setTargeting("brandId","101"),htlbid.setTargeting("authorId","63521"),htlbid.setTargeting("tags",["Awful","quotes","inspirational","jim florentine ","everybody"]),htlbid.setTargeting("is_testing","no"),htlbid.layout()}))</script><script>var googletag = googletag || {};
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        pbjs.setConfig({ pageUrl: https://www.barstoolsports.com/video-podcast/2342867/shitty-inspirational-quotes });</script><script src="https://d9rde3y35j061.cloudfront.net/script.js"></script><script src="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/embed.js" async></script><style>.union__content{font-family:-apple-system,HelveticaNeue,Roboto,sans-serif;font-weight:400;font-size:18px;color:#5a5b5d;word-wrap:break-word;box-sizing:border-box;padding:0 5px 32px 5px}.union__content p{padding:0;margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content img{display:block;width:100%!important;height:auto;margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content video{display:block!important;width:100%!important;height:auto;margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content .articleAd{text-align:center;margin:16px 0 0 0;background-color:#f5f5f5}.union__content .htlad__container{display:inline-block}.union__content p a{color:#377dc4}.union__content .oembed__wrapper{margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content blockquote:not(.twitter-video){display:block;margin:16px 0 0 0;padding:4px 12px;border-left:4px solid #77889a;font-style:italic;background:#f0f4f8;text-align:left;border-radius:0 6px 6px 0}.union__content blockquote:not(.twitter-video) p{font-style:italic}.union__content blockquote,q{quotes:none}.union__content iframe{max-width:100%}.union__content .bs-image-hidden{display:none}.union__content div.hq-image{width:fit-content;margin:0 auto}.union__content span.image-attribution,.union__content span.image-attribution a{color:#757575;font-size:12px;font-style:italic;letter-spacing:.1px;line-height:14px;text-decoration:none;padding:0;margin:0}.union__content .bs-videoPlayer .bs-videoPlayer__container,.union__content video-js,.wp-video{width:100%!important;height:0!important;position:relative;padding-bottom:56.25%;overflow:hidden;margin:16px 0 0 0}.wp-video video{width:100%!important;height:100%!important}.hq-image video{width:100%!important;height:100%!important}.union__content .bs-videoPlayer__container>iframe{position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;border:none}@media (prefers-color-scheme:dark){.union__content,body,html{background:#1c1c1c;color:#f1f1f1}.union__content blockquote:not(.twitter-video){border-left:4px solid #367dc4;background:#272c35}}</style><script>window.addEventListener("applicationDidBecomeActive",(()=>{document.querySelectorAll(".hq-image video[autoplay]").forEach((e=>e.play()))}))</script></head><body class="union__content"><p><strong>Read The Blogs:</strong></p><p><a href="https://www.barstoolsports.com/blog/2340842/smokeshow-to-the-rescue-for-the-dolphins"><em>Smokeshow To The Rescue For The Dolphins</em></a></p><p><a href="https://www.barstoolsports.com/video-podcast/2331442/badass-outs-herself-as-only-a-badass-would"><em>Badass Outs Herself As Only A Badass Would</em></a></p><p><strong>Highlights From This Week's Podcast:</strong></p><p>“Let your heart be your compass” - Yea thanks, if I always listened to my heart ...I would never leave the strip club <strong>(4:25)</strong></p><p>“Yea, sex is nice, but when you haven’t been held in months, sex isn’t what you miss the most.” - Here's a typical guy that is directing a quote at ONE WOMAN only <strong>(14:01)</strong></p><p>“There are no perfect husbands, and no perfect wives, but if you keep believing in each other, there will be plenty of perfect moments in your marriage” - Yuck. Yea, I didn't know people weren't perfect. <strong>(17:17)</strong></p><p>“I keep my circle small, and my wall high. Be careful not to underestimate me. Fuck what you heard.” - Whoa, watch out for this guy <strong>(24:31)</strong></p><p>“One morning, she woke up different.” - Rant <strong>(30:22)</strong></p><p>“Hey Jim, every week the managers at my work look up quotes to post on the eraser board in the break room for employees to read. This week’s a quote from Roosevelt. NOBODY reads them.” - Hey boss, I’m just tryna make a spreadsheet. I’m not trying to win the battle of Gettysburg (40:20)</p><p><strong>Hoodies' & T-Shirts</strong></p><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/wArkJAI" href="https://store.barstoolsports.com/products/everybody-is-awful-except-you-logo-hoodie?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63521_101_shitty-inspirational-quotes&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63521_101_shitty-inspirational-quotes"></a></div></div><div id="Article-Ad-Placeholder" data-union-ad></div></div><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/1o6kUjV" href="https://store.barstoolsports.com/products/everybody-is-awful-except-you-logo-tee?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63521_101_shitty-inspirational-quotes&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63521_101_shitty-inspirational-quotes"></a></div></div></div><p><strong>Download The Podcast</strong></p><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/aIvbmr8" href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/everybody-is-awful-except-you-with-jim-florentine/id1495087840"></a></div></div></div></body></html>

<p><strong>Read The Blogs:</strong></p><p><a href="https://www.barstoolsports.com/blog/2340842/smokeshow-to-the-rescue-for-the-dolphins"><em>Smokeshow To The Rescue For The Dolphins</em></a></p><p><a href="https://www.barstoolsports.com/video-podcast/2331442/badass-outs-herself-as-only-a-badass-would"><em>Badass Outs Herself As Only A Badass Would</em></a></p><p><strong>Highlights From This Week's Podcast:</strong></p><p>“Let your heart be your compass” - Yea thanks, if I always listened to my heart ...I would never leave the strip club <strong>(4:25)</strong></p><p>“Yea, sex is nice, but when you haven’t been held in months, sex isn’t what you miss the most.” - Here's a typical guy that is directing a quote at ONE WOMAN only <strong>(14:01)</strong></p><p>“There are no perfect husbands, and no perfect wives, but if you keep believing in each other, there will be plenty of perfect moments in your marriage” - Yuck. Yea, I didn't know people weren't perfect. <strong>(17:17)</strong></p><p>“I keep my circle small, and my wall high. Be careful not to underestimate me. Fuck what you heard.” - Whoa, watch out for this guy <strong>(24:31)</strong></p><p>“One morning, she woke up different.” - Rant <strong>(30:22)</strong></p><p>“Hey Jim, every week the managers at my work look up quotes to post on the eraser board in the break room for employees to read. This week’s a quote from Roosevelt. NOBODY reads them.” - Hey boss, I’m just tryna make a spreadsheet. I’m not trying to win the battle of Gettysburg (40:20)</p><p><strong>Hoodies' & T-Shirts</strong></p><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/wArkJAI" href="https://store.barstoolsports.com/products/everybody-is-awful-except-you-logo-hoodie?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63521_101_shitty-inspirational-quotes&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63521_101_shitty-inspirational-quotes"></a></div></div><div id="Article-Ad-Placeholder" data-union-ad></div></div><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/1o6kUjV" href="https://store.barstoolsports.com/products/everybody-is-awful-except-you-logo-tee?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63521_101_shitty-inspirational-quotes&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63521_101_shitty-inspirational-quotes"></a></div></div></div><p><strong>Download The Podcast</strong></p><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/aIvbmr8" href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/everybody-is-awful-except-you-with-jim-florentine/id1495087840"></a></div></div></div>

Shitty Inspirational Quotes

An Actual Adult Posted This On Facebook And It's Absolutely Stupid

Your 8-year-old didn't say this

This Deserves A Lot More Silence Than It Got

Be Prepared For An Avalanche of "I Got Vaccinated" Posts

Man attacks his online critic ...this is some Florida shit