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Everybody is Awful (Except You)

New York

A lady takes off her underwear in a post office and uses it as a mask. A man fucks a horse and doesn't pull out. Another man is asked to leave a threesome, and then wants back in.

Barstool Sports presents Jim Florentine as the host of the Everybody is Awful (Except You) podcast. Jim has recorded six stand-up comedy albums and shot four full-length specials. On television Jim hosted 7 seasons of VH1 Classic's "That Metal Show" as well as lending his voice to the ground breaking "Crank Yankers". On radio Jim has been a regular on The Howard Stern show, the Opie & Anthony show and currently hosts his own program on Sirius. In addition Jim is a best selling author, world-renowned voice over talent, and has been featured in the film's "Beer League" with Artie Lange and "Trainwreck" with Amy Schumer. Subscribe now.

Everybody is Awful (Except You) with Jim Florentine

You Can Use Your Underwear As A Mask

<!DOCTYPE html><html lang="en"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width,initial-scale=1,maximum-scale=1,user-scalable=no,shrink-to-fit=no"><title>Parking Lot Stand-Up Show: Honk If You Laugh</title><link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="https://htlbid.com/v3/app.barstoolsports.com/htlbid.css"><script async src="https://htlbid.com/v3/app.barstoolsports.com/htlbid.js"></script><script>window.htlbid=window.htlbid||{},htlbid.cmd=htlbid.cmd||[],htlbid.cmd.push((function(){htlbid.setTargeting("pagetype","blog"),htlbid.setTargeting("brandId","101"),htlbid.setTargeting("authorId","63544"),htlbid.setTargeting("tags",["city","Awful","stand up","atlantic","jim florentine ","everybody"]),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_keywords",["nfl week","sad stat","game","fantasy point","one yard-line","team","end zone","line","giants","yard","new york","season","field sunday","bears","marc bulger"]),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_IABv1",["IAB17","IAB17-38","IAB17-26","IAB17-12"]),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_IABv2",["484","483","537","533","490"]),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_IABv3",["484","483","537","533","490"]),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_positive","0.14"),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_neutral","0.71"),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_negative","0.15"),htlbid.setTargeting("is_testing","no"),htlbid.layout()}))</script><script>var googletag = googletag || {};
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        pbjs.setConfig({ pageUrl: https://www.barstoolsports.com/video-podcast/2553495/parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh });</script><script src="https://d9rde3y35j061.cloudfront.net/script.js"></script><script src="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/embed.js" async></script><style>.union__content{font-family:-apple-system,HelveticaNeue,Roboto,sans-serif;font-weight:400;font-size:18px;color:#5a5b5d;word-wrap:break-word;box-sizing:border-box;padding:0 5px 32px 5px}.union__content p{padding:0;margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content img{display:block;width:100%!important;height:auto;margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content video{display:block!important;width:100%!important;height:auto;margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content .articleAd{text-align:center;margin:16px 0 0 0;background-color:#f5f5f5}.union__content .htlad__container{display:inline-block}.union__content p a{color:#377dc4}.union__content .oembed__wrapper{margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content blockquote:not(.twitter-video){display:block;margin:16px 0 0 0;padding:4px 12px;border-left:4px solid #77889a;font-style:italic;background:#f0f4f8;text-align:left;border-radius:0 6px 6px 0}.union__content blockquote:not(.twitter-video) p{font-style:italic}.union__content blockquote,q{quotes:none}.union__content iframe{max-width:100%}.union__content .bs-image-hidden{display:none}.union__content div.hq-image{width:fit-content;margin:0 auto}.union__content span.image-attribution,.union__content span.image-attribution a{color:#757575;font-size:12px;font-style:italic;letter-spacing:.1px;line-height:14px;text-decoration:none;padding:0;margin:0}.union__content .bs-videoPlayer .bs-videoPlayer__container,.union__content video-js,.wp-video{width:100%!important;height:0!important;position:relative;padding-bottom:56.25%;overflow:hidden;margin:16px 0 0 0}.wp-video video{width:100%!important;height:100%!important}.hq-image video{width:100%!important;height:100%!important}.union__content .bs-videoPlayer__container>iframe{position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;border:none}@media (prefers-color-scheme:dark){.union__content,body,html{background:#1c1c1c;color:#f1f1f1}.union__content blockquote:not(.twitter-video){border-left:4px solid #367dc4;background:#272c35}}</style><script>window.addEventListener("applicationDidBecomeActive",(()=>{document.querySelectorAll(".hq-image video[autoplay]").forEach((e=>e.play()))}))</script></head><body class="union__content"><p>When I first started doing stand up comedy I would perform anywhere.  Strip clubs, biker bars, sports bars, bachelor parties and any other place that had a microphone.  I didn’t even need a stage.  I did comedy one time in a bar standing on top of a pool table!  </p><p>This lockdown shut down my addiction to getting onstage at least 5 days a week.  After 77 days off, I decided I couldn’t stay home another Saturday night and I heard about drive in comedy shows.  I went to feed my addiction, and this is the result. </p><p><strong>Listen to the latest podcast:</strong></p><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/r4UM2DC?_showcaption=true" href="https://twitter.com/EverybodyAwful/status/1270844804189106179?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh"></a></div></div></div><p><strong>Hoodies' & T-Shirts</strong></p><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/kfsivAP" href="https://store.barstoolsports.com/products/everybody-is-awful-except-you-logo-hoodie?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh"></a></div></div><div id="Article-Ad-Placeholder" data-union-ad></div></div><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/dk9IfvC" href="https://store.barstoolsports.com/products/everybody-is-awful-except-you-logo-tee?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh"></a></div></div></div><p><strong>Download & Subscribe</strong></p><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/aIvbmr8" href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/everybody-is-awful-except-you-with-jim-florentine/id1495087840?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh"></a></div></div></div></body></html>

<p>When I first started doing stand up comedy I would perform anywhere.  Strip clubs, biker bars, sports bars, bachelor parties and any other place that had a microphone.  I didn’t even need a stage.  I did comedy one time in a bar standing on top of a pool table!  </p><p>This lockdown shut down my addiction to getting onstage at least 5 days a week.  After 77 days off, I decided I couldn’t stay home another Saturday night and I heard about drive in comedy shows.  I went to feed my addiction, and this is the result. </p><p><strong>Listen to the latest podcast:</strong></p><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/r4UM2DC?_showcaption=true" href="https://twitter.com/EverybodyAwful/status/1270844804189106179?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh"></a></div></div></div><p><strong>Hoodies' & T-Shirts</strong></p><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/kfsivAP" href="https://store.barstoolsports.com/products/everybody-is-awful-except-you-logo-hoodie?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh"></a></div></div><div id="Article-Ad-Placeholder" data-union-ad></div></div><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/dk9IfvC" href="https://store.barstoolsports.com/products/everybody-is-awful-except-you-logo-tee?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh"></a></div></div></div><p><strong>Download & Subscribe</strong></p><div class="oembed__wrapper"><div class="iframely-embed" style="max-width:550px"><div class="iframely-responsive" style="padding-bottom:100%"><a data-iframely-url="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/aIvbmr8" href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/everybody-is-awful-except-you-with-jim-florentine/id1495087840?utm_source=barstoolsports&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=blog&utm_term=63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh&utm_campaign=barstoolsports_referral_blog_63544_101_parking-lot-stand-up-show-honk-if-you-laugh"></a></div></div></div>

Parking Lot Stand-Up Show: Honk If You Laugh

An Actual Adult Posted This On Facebook And It's Absolutely Stupid

Your 8-year-old didn't say this

This Deserves A Lot More Silence Than It Got

Be Prepared For An Avalanche of "I Got Vaccinated" Posts

Man attacks his online critic ...this is some Florida shit